This is Home

It's hard to parent. Especially difficult is when the child you are parenting is taller than you, totally entertaining, generally well-behaved, and yet shockingly irresponsible and/or thoughtless.

You may have noticed that I haven't posted for several days. It's been a rough week. Two of Kev's teachers contacted me to report odd behaviors. The second teacher was nearly in tears when I spoke to her. Kevin is now grounded to within an inch of his life. His wardrobe is pared down to six or seven "plain" shirts and four or five pairs of "plain" jeans/pants. No cool accessories sporting skulls and crossbones or deathbats. No checkerboard shoes. No fur-lined hoodies, or hoodies of any kind, actually.

Also, he is banned from the computer except for a (monitored) hour a week, split up into two sessions if he chooses. Banned from using his phone to have contact with anyone not a relative. And I instructed him as he cleared out his bedroom of all "stuff" except for his bed, a work table, and chair. No stereo, no games, no junk of any kind to fool with. Musical instruments stay available.

Now he has so much more time to study for the classes he apparently wasn't paying any attention to. And so much more time to hang out with his MOTHER who can further instruct him on proper human behavior since it appears I failed in my attempts to ingrain that knowledge in the first thirteen years. Respect for teachers, proper attitudes regarding school, treatment of females (whether they behave like ladies or not, you are to behave like a gentleman, duh) respect for self, love of learning, and even the excitement over everyday joys like playing with your dogs or watching the all new American Gladiators!!!

He's a good boy. He'll get back to where he needs to be. Everyone gets off the straight and narrow from time to time and I can only thank God that his wanderings don't yet include substance abuse or ANY KIND OF SEXUAL ACTIVITIES. Sorry. Had to be sure he heard me on that last point. Thirteen is a bit young for such things and since his birthday is rapidly approaching, FOURTEEN IS TOO YOUNG ALSO.

But back to the grown-up stuff.

Rich is happily working in Philadelphi for a few weeks (I say "happily" because it means he doesn't have to deal with all of the above, or at least not at too close a distance!) and while Kev and I hack our way through the jungle of mother/son angst, I'm the grown-up in charge.

So today while I was cleaning a house, a Sheryl Crow song came up on my mp3 player. It was an old favorite entitled "Home" and some of the lyrics say "I'm going crazy, a little everyday... everything I wanted is now driving me away..." Throw in the word "insane" in place of "away" and you'll see why such a melancholy song made me laugh as I vacuumed someone else's sofa. When I came home this afternoon, I was happy to see the boy. It's always good to find a reminder of your blessings.

I'm off to count mine right now so I don't forget some of the tiny, little ones that make all the big, troublesome ones come out all right in the end.